Top 10 Most Eligible Bachelors in Sports - #7 - Joe Mauer

Sliding in at #7 on our list is All-Star catcher, All-American boy, and all around stud, Joe Mauer. Mauer, 26, who as far as the Sports Bros can gather is single, or single enough, is the catcher for the Minnesota Twins. In 2001 the Twins selected Mauer out of high school with the #1 overall pick in the draft. Since then, Mauer has 2 batting titles, 3 All-Star appearances, and a gold glove to his name. In high school, Mauer might have actually been more of a pussy magnet then he is now. He was named "National High School Quarterback Of The Year" in 2000 by The National Quarterback Club (lead his football team to a state championship in '99), and was an All-State basketball player, as well. He's currently in the midst of a 4-year, 33 million dollar contract with the Twins. If this were a "best sideburns in sports" list, he would undoubtably be at the top. Joe Mauer: Modest, wholesome, dreamy, athletic, single. Sports Bros' #7 most eligible bachelor in sports.

Very Superstitious

One of our readers, SportsBro Alex Kaskel, has recently pointed out a great top 10 of the most bizarre athlete superstitions. We've all heard of athletes doing weird stuff to get them ready for games (Wade Boggs ate a bucket of fried chicken, Clemens used to get a trainer to rub Icy Hot on his balls to get him "pumped up" to pitch...) but this list provides a diverse array of strange rituals. I'm not sure you can count peeing as your hands (Moises Alou) as superstitious (I think it actually hardens your hands so you don't need batting gloves), but it did result on one of my favorite Sports Illustrated "They Said It"'s of all time...

When asked about Moises Alou peeing on his hands while playing for the cubs, Dusty Baker said, "I have noticed a lot of guys avoid giving him high fives, they usually just give him the fist."

Top 10 Most Eligible Bachelors in Sports - #8 - Dwight Howard

Dwight Howard is #8 on the Most Eligible Bachelors List. Dwight is a gargantuan man, standing tall at nearly 7 feet (6'11). However, is incredible hulk size is deemed acceptable by most ladies, considering its vital to his success in the N.B.A., and the fact that it means his junk is inversely proportional to Mr. Mackey's. Dwight went straight to the N.B.A. out of college, which is a good thing from a girls standpoint because he's probably at their lower level than most guys intellectually.

Howard is only 23 and has an $80 million contract, as well as the nickname "Superman." He has been to the NBA Finals and was the starting center of the U.S.A. team that won the Gold Medal in the Olympics. Factor this in with the fact that he has a great smile, a great sense of humor, and is a devoted Christian (which is a big turn-on for most girls). Ladies are going to have to wear some large high heels to not look like a midget next to him; however, I think he has enough things going for him that ladies will deal with his massiveness. Dwight Howard: successful, strong, young, good-looking, funny, #8 on Sports Most Eligible Bachelors.

Obama's First Pitch

Tonight sports fans across the nation will tune in to the Midsummer Classic as baseball's best battle it out for home field advantage in the World Series (a sketchy incentive). The NL hasn't won in forever but have managed to produce what looks to be a team capable of winning this thing for the first time in twelve years. Regardless of all of that, this night promises to be interesting for a very different reason: The implications of the first pitch, to be thrown by our 44th President, Barack Obama. These things have always fascinated me. Where will they throw from? How good is their arm? Will it be a strike?

I was never a fan of Obama's predecessor, George W. Bush, but in the 2001 World Series, in the aftermath of the attacks on the World Trade Center, he delivered what I still consider to be one of the coolest moments to ever grace a baseball diamond. With a secret service agent disguised as an umpire, a heavy Kevlar vest protecting his chest, in the wake of the greatest terrorist attack of our generation, W. strolled out to the rubber, and from the full 60 ft. 6 inches delivered a perfect strike. Now St. Louis is no New York, the all-star game is no World Series, the recession is no 9/11 (in terms of impact and emotion), but Obama's toss means something, whether we want to admit it or not. Tonight the man that represents our entire nation will partake in the most American of traditions. Will he do old W. one better? Only time will tell.

Matt Cassel - Making Bank?

Career backup (seriously, collegiate and professionally) Matt Cassel has just signed a six year, $63 million deal with the Kansas City Chiefs. Somewhere, Matt Leinhart just dropped his funnel in disbelief.

The franchise tag on the ex-Pat backup guarantees him $28 million, and he is scheduled to make upwards of $10 million each year. All in all, not bad for a guy who has started less than 20 games in his career.

While it might piss some people off (cough...Leinhart...cough) to see a guy like Cassel haul in some major dough after one season in which he didn't even lead his team to the playoffs, this type of story is so common in sports. As a Yankee fan, trust me, I know.

As it turns out, the Matt Cassel technique is becoming an increasingly viable option for professional athletes everywhere. It doesn't take an established career to haul in the big money. Even in horrible economic times, teams throw around insane amounts of cake, fearing that they're gonna miss out on the next big free agent.

Cassel is a sure fire example of it in the NFL, the Yankees pull one every year (AJ Burnett comes immediately to mind), and with the Magic matching the Mavs offer of 5 years, $34 million to keep backup center Marcin Gortat, we know something is seriously wrong, especially when we find out that "the Polish Hammer" was actually disappointed with the deal...

Bottom line, it takes one well-timed, good year to get paid if you're a pro athlete these days. Sometimes, it doesn't even take that. The contract year is the equivalent of serious beer goggles for any GM. Putting up a flukish walk year is the equivalent of turning to your buddy and saying "Hey man, she's actually not that bad" after your fifteenth beer (fifth beer for Loop). While I'm not saying Cassel will bust (he's gotta be better than Brodie Croyle), I would think GMs everywhere would be starting to learn from all the mistakes they've made.

As for Cashman, let him spend all he wants.

Batting Stance Guy Does It All

Courtesy of BroBible, we discovered this guy today. Gar Ryness, who appears to be just an average bro, possesses the incredible ability to imitate nearly every MLB batting stance, past and present. By doing this he has achieved every SportsBros dream of making a living doing a completely useless activity. In honor of the All-Star Game, he appeared on Letterman last night, but if you check out his website you can find links to his YouTube channel and see him impersonate your favorite teams' lineup. The above video is just him clowning around with Manny (who loves it). Below, you see him bring his skills to the big time with Dave on late night.