Lance, Lance, Lance

LOOP - The Tour de France is showcased on the versus sports network. For any of you who aren’t particularly familiar with versus, you can hop on their website. “The official website of bull riding, NHL hockey (hockey fans are not going to love Los Sports Bros), and the Tour de France.” The topic of this article is listed behind bull riding, so I don’t expect their to be a wealth of knowledge out there on it, and I’m not going to claim to have too much myself.

Here are some of the most basic facts: At this point, stage 4 has been completed, and Lance Armstrong (at the age of 37 and with one testicle) is in second place by tenths of a second. Let me start off by saying that I’m extremely biased when talking about Lance. I’m a sketchily avid cyclist, I’ve read, “It’s not about the Bike, my Journey Back to Life” twice, and a Livestrong bracelet has been on my right wrist for the better part of five years (with the tan line to prove it). I love the man and I’m 40% sure I’d take a bullet for him in the arm or leg, and considering we’ve never met I think that’s fairly high praise.

On October 2, 1996 (I know the date by heart and did not have to look it up), he was diagnosed with cancer that had spread to his lungs, abdomen, and brain. Years of treatment, one testicle, and seven Tour de Frances later, the guy is still plugging away at the age of 37. I’m not sure about you, but when I think of 37 year olds I think of the sweaty, hairy, d-bags I play pickup basketball with at college who wear 6 knee braces and sport goggles, not Tour winners.

I know what the cynics, and the critics, and the Lance-haters of the world say, because I’ve heard it all. I’ve read it in newspapers, I’ve seen it on the web and I’ve watched it on TV. The longest section of the guy’s Wikipedia page is entitled “Allegations of drug use.” I know we live in an era of sports plagued by steroids and asterisks, and by athletes like Barry Bonds and Marion Jones and Mark Belhorn ((joke, but he was juicing (I still love him)). The people my age grew up in this era. We learned to love sports during stretches of our lives like in the summer of 1998, when Sosa and McGwire were racing away, becoming our Mantle and Maris. Unfortunately, slowly but surely the recollections of those great times in our sports adolescences have been contaminated. Now, whenever something great comes along in sports we have second and third thoughts. We are always questioning and we are immensely cautious to believe.

Believe in Lance. I urge you to, I implore you to. I’ll leave you with a few Lance facts to validate that request.

• 7 (maybe 8) Tour De France victories
• Hilarious cameos in “You me and Dupree” and “Dodegball”
• Olsen twin (not going to pretend like I know which one)
• Beat a shitload of cancer
• No positive drug tests, despite all of the allegations
• Sheryl Crow
• Ridiculously profitable cancer foundation
• Kate Hudson
• 37 years old competing at the highest level in the most physically demanding sports known to man
• He can do crazy stuff like run a sub 3 hour marathon on a whim
• Olsen twin